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Archive for the ‘WTF?’ Category

Australian Senate Chokes on Carbon Bill

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Senator Stephen ‘Peaked in Pre-School’ Fielding truly is the pubic hair stuck in the throat of Australian democracy. Imposed on us by a Labor Party too control-hungry to preference Greens, he has probably cost the country $7B in compensation to heavily polluting industries – such as coal, electricity, and aluminium production – and ensured the creation and imposition of a weak, flawed, messy, and ineffective Carbon Pollution Reduction Scheme – more accurately referred to by Greens Senator Rachel Siewert as the Coal Profits Retention Scheme.

Stephen Feel Ding underestimates his answer to the question, 'how stupid am I?'

Without Fielding, the timid and thumb-twiddling government could negotiate with a crossbench more likely made up of progressives with sufficient votes to secure a majority, rather than having to target a confused and even more visionless opposition, knowing that any possibility for a crossbench majority is stymied by the presence of Lord Effwit.

Speaking to the Senate just now about the proposed bundle of carbon legislation, Fielding has again emphasized his credentials as an engineer, and therefore a scientist in much the same way that an abattoir-worker might claim accreditation as a surgeon. He attributed the hysteria surrounding climate change to the brutal and self-interested ostracisation of all those brilliant scientists who argue that climate change has nothing to do with carbon, if it is even happening at all. Furthermore, he blamed that vicious piece of propaganda by Al Gore – The Innocent Truth. Oops. Duh.

At least Fielding called for sanity. We have been all carried away by this notion that exponential carbon emissions since 1995 are impacting global warming, when it hasn’t been increasingly hot every single year. After all, in Australia we have only had 8 of this country’s 10 hottest years since 2000, as have many countries around the planet.

But then again, Fielding is the only person in the Australian Parliament who realizes that Copenhagen is best pronounced as two words (Copen *pause 2 3 4* Hagen).

These idiots who think that lack of absolute proof is proof of absolute lack understand not even the slightest portion of the incredibly complex and ever-growing body of climate science. Even in the early ‘90s, scientists were clear in the fact that part of the model’s predictability must necessarily be its unpredictability. Idiot mouthpieces who triumphantly proclaim that the climate’s refusal to behave as uniformly predictably as Lego somehow disproves 2500 of the world’s leading climate scientists’ conservative predictions would perhaps better serve humanity as involuntary organ donors.

I’m looking at you, Fielding… Abetz… etc.

Then again, climate opportunist George Monbiot has chosen to expose the entire Global Warming Conspiracy today, so I should probably just shut up and enjoy the climatic mundanity.

Written by typingisnotactivism

November 25, 2009 at 11:15 am

WORLD LEADERS SIGN PACT TO AVERT CLIMATE DISASTER

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June 18, 2009
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

TOP HEADLINE: WORLD LEADERS SIGN PACT TO AVERT CLIMATE DISASTER
Newspaper Ignites Hope, Announces “Civil Disobedience Database”

* Civil-disobedience database: http://BeyondTalk.net
* PDF of printed newspaper: http://iht.greenpeace.org/todays-paper/
– Online version: http://www.iht-se.com/
* Video: http://iht.greenpeace.org/video/ (coming soon)
In a front-page ad in today’s International Herald Tribune, the leaders of the European Union thank the European public for having engaged in months of civil disobedience leading up to the Copenhagen climate conference that will be held this December.

“It was only thanks to your massive pressure over the past six months that we could so dramatically shift our climate-change policies…. To those who were arrested, we
thank you.”

There was only one catch: the paper was fake.

Looking exactly like the real thing, but dated December 19th, 2009, a million copies of the fake paper were distributed worldwide by thousands of volunteers in order to show what could be achieved at the Copenhagen climate conference that is scheduled for Dec. 7-18, 2009.

At the moment, the conference is aiming for much more modest cuts, dismissed by leading climate scientists as too little, too late to stave off runaway processes that will lead to millions or even billions of casualties.

The paper describes in detail a powerful (and entirely possible) new treaty to bring carbon levels down below 350 parts per million – the
level climate scientists say we need to achieve to avoid climate catastrophe.

One article describes how a website, http://BeyondTalk.net, mobilized thousands of people to put their bodies on the line to
confront climate change policies – ever since way back in June, 2009.

Although the newspaper is a fake (its production and launch were coordinated by Greenpeace), the website is real. Beyondtalk.net is part of a growing network of websites calling for direct action on climate change, building on statements made in recent months by noted political
figures.

For example, in September Nobel laureate Al Gore asserted that “we have reached the stage where it is time for civil disobedience to
prevent the construction of new coal plants.”

Leading American environmentalist Bill McKibben was enthusiastic about the newspaper’s message and the methods BeyondTalk.net calls for.

“We need a political solution grounded in reality – grounded in physics and chemistry. That will only come if we can muster a wide variety of political tactics, including civil disobedience.”

“Non-violent civil disobedience has been at the forefront of almost every successful campaign for change,” said Andy Bichlbaum of The Yes
Men
, who helped write and edit the newspaper and are furnishing the technology for BeyondTalk.net. “Especially in America, and especially today, we need to push our leaders hard to stand up to industry lobbyists and make the sorts of changes we need.”

“Roosevelt would never have been able to push through the New Deal if people hadn’t taken to the streets, occupied factories, and demanded
it,” noted newspaper writer/editor and University of California professor Lawrence Bogad.

“Segregation, British rule in India, and apartheid wouldn’t have ended without a lot of people being creatively uncooperative – even if that meant getting arrested. Nonviolent civil
disobedience is the bread and butter of progress.”

The fake newspaper also has an ad for “Action Offsets,” whereby those who aren’t willing to risk arrest can help those who are.

A HOPEFUL NEWS PANDEMIC?

Today’s fake International Herald Tribune is part of a rash of recent publications which mimic prominent newspapers. Last November, a fake edition of the New York Times announced that the Iraq War was over. A few days earlier, a hoax USA Today featured the US presidential election result: “Capitalism Wins at the Polls: Anarchy Brewing in the Streets.”
And this April 1st, a spoof edition of Germany’s Zeit newspaper triumphantly announced the end of “casino capitalism” and the abolition
of poor-country debt.

The rash of fakes is likely to continue. “People are going to keep finding ways to get the word out about common-sense solutions those in
power say are impossible,” said Kelli Anderson, one of the designers of the fake International Herald Tribune and co-designer (with Daniel
Dunnam) of BeyondTalk.net.

“We already know what we need to do about climate change,” said Agnes de Rooij of Greenpeace International. “It’s a no-brainer. Reduce carbon emissions, or put the survival of billions of people at risk. If the political will isn’t there now, it’s our duty to inspire it.”

* CONTACT:
– The Yes Men, mailto:press@theyesmen.org
– Mark Breddy (Greenpeace), mailto:mark.breddy@greenpeace.org,
(+32) (0)2 2741 903, (+32) (0)496 15 62 29 (mob.)
– Lawrence Bogad, mailto:l.m.bogad@gmail.com,
+1-212 300 7943

Written by typingisnotactivism

June 18, 2009 at 10:16 pm

Germaine Greer gets it wrong on deadly Aussie bushfires

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Got to admit that I quite enjoyed Germaine Greer’s overtly pragmatic epitaph for Crocodile Hunter Steve Irwin. As a virulent pissing contest engulfed Australian and global semi-celebria, with each successive politician and MTV host proclaiming greater and greater love and admiration for a bloke that many thought of as a bit of a dickhead, albeit a freshly dead one, Greer was the sole voice stating the obvious, namely

What Irwin never seemed to understand was that animals need space. The one lesson any conservationist must labour to drive home is that habitat loss is the principal cause of species loss. There was no habitat, no matter how fragile or finely balanced, that Irwin hesitated to barge into, trumpeting his wonder and amazement to the skies. There was not an animal he was not prepared to manhandle. Every creature he brandished at the camera was in distress.

Which is why it is baffling that she should now display a brilliant lack of intelligence, proclaiming that the highly fatal and destructive bushfires still tormenting Victoria were caused by authorities failing to burn off and a lack of bush clearing.

The simple fact is that the Victorian authority supposedly responsible for forest management, the ironically named Department of Sustainability and Environment (DSE), are all about support for unsustainable forest practices. They more or less prostitute their taxpayer-funded services to the woodchip industry, which does nothing but clear bush – old bush, new bush, sick bush, healthy bush.

The DSE are in fact such vigorous fans of the hazard reduction techniques known as back-burning that it is barely eight years since ‘controlled burns’ they were overseeing (supposedly) did what fires do in the face of 30-knot winds, destroying roughly a million hectares of native forest. As a result, logging lobbyists secured a commitment from the Victorian government, enabling them to access massive stands of ancient forest, to make up for the volume of wood no longer able to be cut down for the simple reason that it had been turned to charcoal.

Far from adding what is usually a dissenting and radical voice to this particular discussion, Greer is simply, and ignorantly, piping the same shrill chorus soon to be sung by all the usual idiot lobbyists like Barry Chipman and anybody from Timber Communities Australia, the Institute of Public Affairs, the Liberal and National Parties, etc. Namely – that this tragedy wouldn’t have happened if conservationists hadn’t interfered with sound forest management practices.

Obviously, bushfires wouldn’t happen if humans could fight back by cutting down every bloody tree and killing every bloody native animal – a far cry from Greer’s anti-Irwin argument. Bloody human-hating Greenies f%&$ed us all again, they proclaim.

But the simple fact is that nature and forests can quite perfectly manage themselves, if just left alone long enough to functionally exist. The remaining areas of Victoria’s old growth forest – concentrated in and arounf the Otways and East Gippsland – still retain enough moisture to function not only as massive biodiversity store-houses, but as difficult-to-ignite fire buffers. Less human intervention, through irresponsible land clearing and corporate logging, is the answer, not the problem.

Greer would do better to understand this before firing one off on such a mishandled issue. She has done herself, myriad species, and all natural environments, not to mention the dead and damaged, a massive disservice with this fresh strand of vomit.

Better she had shut her mouth rather than emit it.

Written by typingisnotactivism

February 13, 2009 at 10:17 am

Australian media link Obama to Crack

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The Sydney Morning Herald has reached a desperate new low today, and it is anybody’s guess why. This paper is on one hand trying to promote itself as cool and edgy, with colourful stroboscopic TV ads soundtracked by a theme plagiaristically close to Rage Against the Machine’s ‘I won’t do whatcha tell me!’ On the other hand, it also frequently runs conservative snootiness masquerading as irony and continues to question and even deny the very actual reality of devastating climate change.

So when they try to associate Barack Obama with crack cocaine is it because they think destructive drug references are edgy and cool (which they aren’t), or because their increasingly conservative editorial agenda finds something satisfying in making a racist slur against the new US President-elect?

What? Crack cocaine use is much more common amongst lower income brackets in America. Blacks in America are still more likely than white Americans to be economically disadvantaged. And American courts treat crack much more harshly than cocaine, which is generally used by people with a much higher disposable income.

Odds are that if you’re in America and your problem is crack, you’re black, and you’re going to get a harsher sentence than Wall Street when he gets caught with uncut Peruvian coming back from his Obama inauguration party. Statistically speaking.

The New York Times has been running this story for the past couple of days: Lose the Blackberry? Yes he can, maybe. It’s a very interesting article about how the US President is, in a way, locked in the watchtower. When Obama takes office on Jan. 20, he may well be denied his mobile phone and even email access because of laws relating to communications from the President of the United States.

Today (timely, as always) the Sydney Morning Herald is running exactly the same story, and the are attributing it to The New York Times. Except that they have changed the title to

Obama might have to kick his CrackBerry habit

and inexplicably altered the line

For years, like legions of other professionals, Mr. Obama has been all but addicted to his BlackBerry.

to instead read

For years, like legions of other on-the-move professionals, Mr Obama has been all but addicted to his BlackBerry – or CrackBerrys as they are sometimes called for exactly that reason..

As you can see, the sloppy Herald insert is evident by the appearance of two fullstops.

Now – and I’m just guessing here – writers in New York have seen a lot of the social problems and devastation of crack addiction across poorer areas of their city. They have seen that many black communities have been deeply affected by it in an almost cancerous manner. And they have seen a number of other American media outlets repeatedly tie black skin to crack addiction and drug abuse generally in a pervasive and decidedly racebaiting manner. So it would never even occur to them to use the term “Crackberry” in writing about anybody, let alone their President-elect.

The Sydney Morning Herald, on the other hand – just what the f#$% are they trying to say?

Breaking news: McCain takes lead

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in shit-eating contest.

seriously… you want people who stage fast-food-tolerating down-and-folksy photo ops in charge of all the things that an American president can use to f@%k the world?

You’re a bunch of friggin’ Miss Carolinas.

Written by typingisnotactivism

September 10, 2008 at 1:27 am

What’s better than right wing Christian nut jobs in the White House? Maybe fake pregnancies….

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George W & McBrains actual running mate
George W & McBrain’s actual running mate

John McCain is dangerously mental – it’s simple. Obama can’t deliver all that he promises and some of the promises on which he can deliver (like more support for Israel and nuclear power) are scary but now the whole billion dollar race for the White House has taken on a David Lynch twist.

This article in the Daily Kos and its sequel right here make the claim that Sarah Palin, McCain’s purely strategic nominee for the vice presidency (maverickly chosen ultra-conservative female fundie Xtian) has faked the birth of her most tactically wonderful Downs Syndrome un-aborted 5-month old baby.

one of these people is 7 months pregnant…..

According to the story & photos, she showed no signs of pregnancy, even at what was supposedly 7 months, and spent more than 8 hours on a plane after her water had broken. And nobody noticed her going into anything resembling labour.

And in the follow up story, it is reported that around what should have been the 7 month mark (for Sarah)

one of these people is 7 months pregnant.....

her 16-year old daughter was involved in a car collision, driving a vehicle leaving a family medical centre according to the police report.

Of course, that could be a coincidence. She may have just dropped off her mum. During her break from school.

When she took off some time for an infection.

That lasted 5 months.

What’s that Scully?

Holy crap! Just in, this piece from New York Times – the 16-year-old anti-abortion puppet doesn’t seem to have learned a thing. She’s pregnant again! Seems the Palins aren’t going to wait for the Pretzeldency, and are trying to breed their way to global domination instead.

Naaaasty.

Written by typingisnotactivism

September 2, 2008 at 1:24 am

Microsoft’s fraudathon: Screw charity, let’s self-promote!

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Looks like shaving foam; could be Marketing McManjam...

Parker Whittle is so real. He shaves. He uses Flickr, where his name is P-Whit (too easy to make something else out of that, hey?). And with a heart of gold, he’s launching himself into a 30-day email and i.m.-a-thon to raise an unknowable amount of money at an undisclosed rate for a handful of mainstream charities.

And the best part? It’s not your money. It’s Microsoft’s money. It’s like you’re reaching into the Man’s pockets and taking cash and handing it to a hungry person, every time you hit “enter.” The i’m Initiative turns you into Robin Hood with a goofy screen name.

Every time Parker, the Parkster, the P Man, or Da P, as his close friends call him, uses Windows Messenger or any other similarly contorted piece of Windows communicationware over the next month, Microsoft – “the Man” – sweats “coin”.

Parker could have just said “money” but he’s so “shtreet” he says “coin”!!

Oh no he di’n’t!!

He better talk to the handgurrlfren’!!! Read the rest of this entry »

US Democrats – tactical genius!!

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Yes indeed, the US Democrats could well have won the election with ease this year. Having recaptured the Congress and the Senate in 2006, not been the government responsible for the last 8 years of disastrous defence, foreign, domestic, economic, natural disaster, war, and social policies, and running against albino Republican candidate Elmer McFudd – nothing short of every single Democrat coming down with HIV after a massive gay orgy to celebrate Osama Bin Laden’s birthday should really be inverting their ascendancy.

But what can be said about a party pouring all its supporters’ time, effort, hopes, and dollars into an ever-widening chasm of self-loathing? Cheese-eating surrender monkeys? Spineless slaves to peecee guilt? Wimpy, wet, directionless intellectually-prostrate masturbatorial over-achievers thoroughly disconnected from the reality of daily life?

Absolutely.

Or, maybe…. tactical geniuses!!

In 2000, right up until he swallowed every drop squirted at him by the Supremely Loaded Court, Al Gore really tried to win the US election. Sure, in 2004 John Kerry didn’t go so far as to get a man’s haircut or even completely extricate that same haircut from his own ass, but you did at least get the sense that he was trying to win.

The Democrats have realized that this is a failed strategy, which immediately recommends them as the next government of America, given that the current brand of dictator wouldn’t recognize a failed strategy even if it turned his Vice President’s daughter gay.

Realizing that they can’t stop their candidate – whoever they end up grudgingly conceding that to be – trying to win, and therefore losing (as has happened twice now), the Dems have come up with a brilliant “Nothing or All” strategy. By doing their utter best to convince the US public and the world at large that they really, really, really don’t deserve to be in charge of a spit bucket, let alone the world’s largest nuclear arsenal/ economy/ etc., they will perhaps have leadership thrust upon them… in pretty much the same way that they haven’t lately.

The natural trajectory of this logic is for Hillary Rodham Clinton to run as Barack Obama’s deputy. Because then when Obama is elected (if the lose-at-all-costs-by-completely-wimping-out-whenever-possible strategy of the DNC works), it will only be a matter of weeks until one of her fanatical sore-loser supporters shoots him dead and raises her paygrade.

At which point her “team” will deny any involvement.

Genius.

Written by typingisnotactivism

June 1, 2008 at 12:10 pm

ur Cat, ai haz it. zmogwtf?!

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catfoundsml.jpg

so the obvious question is “which bit’s funniest?” – ‘not very friendly’, ‘not house broken’, ‘no collar’ or ‘might be scared’? O yeah, there’s also ‘CAT FOUND’!!

*Nelson sez* Haaa Haa

Written by typingisnotactivism

February 21, 2008 at 3:48 pm

Coca Cola to pay for refuelling of Sea Shepherd and Greenpeace anti-whaling vessels.

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In a dramatic move earlier this evening, Terry Davis, the boss of Coca Cola‘s Australian division, announced that the frequently maligned multinational would throw financial weight behind the battle for whale protection in the Australian seas off Antarctica.

Tasmanian brewer Bluetongue Beer was recently purchased by Coca Cola Amatil. During last year’s whaling season, the company donated $250 000 to Sea Shepherd, enabling the group to acquire and operate remote communications equipment, as well as airing the following commercial in Japan. Read the rest of this entry »

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January 24, 2008 at 3:43 am

Sydney Morning Halftruth goes after Garrett some more…

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Why is it that when Australia’s newspapers do actually go after Peter Garrett, it’s for all the wrong reasons? Somehow, for example, a semantic stumble over global negotiations in five years’ time is of far greater importance than his completely chicken-shit support for the rape of Tasmania and his total back down from the position that climate change has something to do with forests, people and carbon – leading to his current epiphany which is that global warming shall somehow be ‘fought’ without anybody having to do anything differently. Whatever.

Point is this, talkback radio host Steve Price is a dickhead. Period. But as this article in the Sydney Moaning Hairball would have you believe, Garrett for some reason decided to confess to Price during a brief airport encounter that once elected, the Rudd government will just back down on all its promises. Even from here, it sounds like a joke. Hell, even the wig that sports a meatsack (aka Richard Wilkins) has spoken out to say that Price read the whole encounter incorrectly.

But check this out – and this is just weird – The Age, like SMH, is owned by Fairfax, yet somehow it manages to consistently be a more informative and broadminded paper giving fewer pages to bullshit and more to a broadeningof issues and news for consideration.

Covering the same story, The Age thought it worth mentioning (and rightly so) that Price’s wife works for Sinister for Employment, Joe Hockey. Price would obviously have an interest in seeing Hockey (and therefore his wife) hold on to their current rates of pay and therefore, one would assume, their current jobs.

So why the hell is the Sydney Morning Herald going beyond dumbing down the news and weakening analysis and heading straight for the kind of censorship that sees stories misrepresented – seemingly with a consistent rightward tilt? Any ideas?

add to kwoff

Written by typingisnotactivism

November 3, 2007 at 1:56 am

Australian Election 2007 – already primed for a USA 2000 outcome?

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  • 200 000 voters “missing”
  • 143 000 voters “scrubbed” from the electoral roll
  • 18% of young adults now blocked from voting
  • public verification of rolls also now blocked.

Johnny Fingers - caught by Gary Ramage

On the day that Prime Minister John Howard finally called the election, political lobby group GetUp called foul. Check out Voting is the Best Revenge, but also consider this:

The Orwellian “Electoral Integrity Act” was pushed through by the Howardocracy last year, ensuring that an historically significant share of Aussies will miss out in 2007.

No new enrolments after 8 pm yesterday – Wednesday October 17th – a full 7 days shorter than last time. Previously, close to half a million people enrolled in this period – almost 80 000 being new enrolments. While it seemed that a similar number would miss that chance this time, there has been an additional blowout.

GetUp also have figures showing that in the last few months, 143 000 Australians have been removed from the electoral rolls. If you are one of them, you’re only going to find out on election day – when you don’t get to vote.

But that’s your own fault, surely? Well, no. According to yesterday’s media release – 4 hours before the first closure of the rolls:

the AEC has revealed only hours before the roll closes that it has actually unenrolled 143,000 Australians in recent months, many of whom are not aware of it, despite many having made efforts to correct their enrolment.

In addition to this figure, and although there may be some overlap the lack of transparency now in effect makes it almost impossible to tell, the Bulletin reported on Monday that the rolls are at least 200 000 voters short of the numbers that would be expected in line with Australia’s growing population.

That’s a lot: about 1.5% of the current roll, or enough to generate over two typically sized electoral divisions (the average enrolment per electoral division was 90,246 as of September 30).

Peter Garrett spruiking paper samples for Gunns' potential retail clientsIn August, credible polling found that over 80 per cent of Australians were still unaware of any of these electoral changes. The AEC’s (Australian Electoral Commission) own research has shown that 18 per cent of eligible 18 to 25-year-olds – still close to the 400 000 people admitted by Coalition Minister of State, Gary Nairn – aren’t enrolled to vote. It’s odd, given that their $12.5 million ad spend equated Aussie democracy with grabbing a sausage. What? This didn’t inspire you to register?

These major changes – including the newly snuck-in more frequent “scrubbing” of the roll – were considered by a Senate Committee a few years ago but vigorously opposed by the AEC’s leadership at the time. Since then a changing of the guard has seen a reversal of some previously key positions held by the electoral watchdog.

For example, this link is no longer active. Before it was removed it featured this statement:

Printed copies of the electoral roll for public inspection and public sale are printed at least once during the first two years of the life of the Parliament.

The relevant page on the new AEC website, however, now states that

The roll is not available for sale in any format.

This change was legislated by Howard in 2004. Based on trends in Australian politics, this new level of diminished transparency creates, at the absolute least, an… ‘enhanced possibility in the perception of procedural risk’.

Undeniably, the Howard leadership has modelled both Party politics and national policy on the model assembled under Ronald Reagan and turbo-charged under George W Bush. There are significant differences, obviously, but super-bureaucracy as a barrier between politicians and public, fear campaigns, nationalism, religion as a political mascot – these are significant and common elements of both national governments.

It’s often said that in a democracy you get the government you deserve. Without the benefit of an accountable Senate, many Aussies now look likely to miss out on the vote they deserve.

And it is a concern when any leader – but particularly an admirer of GWB’s – goes to an election where, by their very actions, transparency is diminished, independence of supervision has been questioned, and opportunities for enrolment are at their most restricted in Australian history.

More importantly, what can Australians now do to curtail the risk of major democratic disenfranchisement come election day?

 

Scoopit!

Written by typingisnotactivism

October 18, 2007 at 10:01 am

an election date with John Howard – hawt!!

with 2 comments

Mmmmm yummy!! A good man is hard to find, so look no further girls and ladyboys. We’ve got a real hawtee for you today. Unfortunately the ad is a couple of years old but all the changes have been for the better. Less hair on the head for tangle-free thinking, more hair on the eyebrows for being taken really srsly internationally, and the invasion fetish may seem a bit subdued lately but only because he’s realized there are plenty of countries that can be invaded right here at home. . . and think of the fuel savings! Ready your Australia Card, he’s coming aboard…
johnny-dreamdate.jpg

Capture some carbon with Johnny Big Oil today – he’ll warm your globe, right after he’s inserted his vapid preamble given your future generations some lip service. Mmmmmmm, lip service.

Written by typingisnotactivism

October 18, 2007 at 9:47 am

Tassie logger blogs on, but WTF??

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This will be of most interest to people following the Tasmanian pulp mill issue which many people believe is heading towards being the next Eureka Stockade.

This chunk of… um…. well-considered logic? industry-endorsed bull$#!& ? waffling oddness? comes from the newborn pro-logging blog Forests Now Tasmania. Should really be Clearfell Now Tasmania, shouldn’t it? Or Clearfell Tasmania Now?

There’s so much wrong in here on so many levels… but why spoil the fun by pointing it out in detail.

See for yourself:

When the mill is built, Tasmania will be into the economic sunshine at last, joining pulp mill driven economies like Bolivia and Vietnam. I, for one, can’t wait.

There will be more anti-mill rallies in Tasmania and on the Tamar, but so what. The pathetic Green resistance will soon collapse as their supporters realise which side their bread is buttered on. Any more of their poncing around and we’ll have another rally for us workers. Makes a good day out on full pay I reckon.

Garrett has promised to make big changes to the Commonwealth’s environment laws that were used to approve the project and, our insiders tell us this must mean, slacken them to buggery to encourage more forestry related activity.

As is now the fashion, Garrett seems to want to include a “climate change trigger”, hopefully that links directly to increasing logging activity. So far he’s been silent on the future of MIS investments and subsidy levels but, if he has any sense (and that’s so far pretty debatable) he’ll increase both to the max!

So hard not to use italics and bold all over this thing, but it pretty much speaks for itself. Basically, if you’re opposed to the mill take heart. Once you get through the pollies that owe favours and the rich cronies that live or die by their lawyers, this is what you’re up against. My prediction is that the whole thing’s a shutdown by November ’08.

Written by typingisnotactivism

October 15, 2007 at 6:00 pm

Forget terrorism – fear democracy. . .

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It’s a simple message. Any media-savvy Australian will understand: a Kevin Rudd led Labor government is an even greater threat to Australian bus stops than Islamic evildoers.

How do we infer this? Because the voice in the scarey anti-Labor ad is a full semi-octave lower than the voice in the scarey “if you see something, send the AFP round to your co-worker’s house” ad.

Wow. That’s scarey. They didn’t even mention that Julia Gillard’s a woman but I’m really convinced I don’t want her driving Australia. It is hard to know which to be more convinced by: manic depressive anti-democracy advertising or Mal Brough’s concern for Aborigines, Kevin Andrew’s concern for refugees, Malcolm Turnbull’s concern for the environment, Peter Costello’s concerns about climate change, or John Howard’s newfound concern for refugees, Aborigines, the environment and climate change.

Either way, this election I too shall be scared into voting for more of the same. And then I shall go skiing in Hell.

thank the lord that Penny Stephens took this photo. David Vincent is my new hero.

Written by typingisnotactivism

October 12, 2007 at 10:52 am

Fitting tribute to our elected visionaries

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You know, this pulp mill farce really does my head in. I think back to around February, the Labor party was really firing up. They seemed to have been overtaken by principles, values, and a righteous determination to set things right.

But now I’m even thinking of putting them behind the Liberals on election day – because the Liberals fuck the environment, they’ll sell out all values that impede profitability – not actual profits, or the existence of profits, but the vastness of profits is the thing to which they slavishly subordinate all other values. But that’s what Liberal Parties do. The Labor party is meant to have some kind of interest, if not in common sense or future generations, then at least in the will of the people. Instead the Labor party has provided no opposition, they haven’t even provided a ‘keeping the bastards honest’ kind of function.

So although the Liberals have maintained their values – none – and delivered for the people what the people expect of the Liberals – nothing – the Labor party didn’t even send their B Team for the big day. Instead, they sent the kid who should have been carrying the oranges to play the All Blacks and made a killing at the TAB.

Which means that even though the Liberals are the ones to have enabled this farce and signed off on the death warrant, the bastards who haven’t done a single thing to challenge, oppose, or stop them are in fact the bigger bastards of the day.

And that’s bizarro.

Written by typingisnotactivism

October 6, 2007 at 12:12 am

Pulp Mill Decision: can Peter Garrett get any Tamar?

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WAAH HA HA HAHAHAHAHAAAAA WAH HAAAAAAA HAHAHAHAHAHAH HAA HAA.

Malcolm Turnbull denies the fact that as Federal Environment Minister, he has both sufficient mandate and resources to step in where state forestry mismanagement threatens national commitments and international obligations on biodiversity and species protection. As a result he has come out with what is likely the most heavily publicised recommendation ever on how best to run a big tube full of crap into an ocean.

This somehow makes the mill assessment complete and above board? I think that Geoffrey Cousins has spoken best to this new flag of the mill-mill-milly-mill crew:

EMMA ALBERICI: Well, he says the conditions are based on the management of effluent, and also on the protection of wildlife.

GEOFFREY COUSINS: Well, they’re based on the two issues that he decided to look at, namely, the marine environment and migratory species, not all wildlife at all. And when the Chief Scientist says that this mill will meet world’s best practice, he means in respect of that particular issue, because he didn’t look at all of the other issues, I’m not being critical of him, he wasn’t permitted to do so. That wasn’t his brief.

Now, Malcolm Turnbull’s job is to protect the environment. He was critical of the Tasmanian Government himself, for closing down that broader public hearing process, and yet he chose not to reinstate it.

I have held out from completely giving up on Peter Garrett but I can’t stand his tinny words any longer. You can’t be the shadow minister for environment and climate change in the party which is supposedly going to drag Australia back out of this 1950s attitude to the environment, and speak platitudes about how you’ve done your best to keep this process credible but now it’s time to really sit on your hands. It’s an utter load of crap.

Obviously his hands are tied by narrowminded politicking going on outside his office door, but even as environmental shadow he has failed to do his job. The general public aren’t aware that the Howard government has quite possibly legislated away the significance of both the Wielangta and Nathan Dam cases. In unison, these two decisions clarify major untested aspects of the EPBC Act, and give the federal minister the responsibility to assess indirect impacts of an action or development (like what might a pulp mill do to forest that isn’t so much growing next to it, but getting logged because of it) and the power to step in where a state isn’t managing forestry in a manner representative of international law – as has already been the case in Tasmania.

Sure that sounds a bit complicated, but at the heart of that information is a simple fact: the Howard government and its environment ministers have been systematically eliminating environmental provisions found to create protection and responsibility by courts. Worse than just ignoring other laws and agreements, this goes to the fundamental collapse of democracy which occurs when the separation of powers is corrupted. Have we heard about this?

The Labor Party is instead hooked into a two-pronged approach which is basically:

appearing united we win, appearing divided – especially on issues relating to Tasmanian logging and one very narrow section of the CFMEU’s national platform – we lose.

and

as long as we’re only clearly different to the Liberal Party on a couple of select issues of broad public concern, we’ll win

Um, here’s an idea

a 10% lead plus common sense plus taking a popular stand plus showing some cojones makes for a bigger, better, surer win than pussing out in the last 2 months of the campaign to save Australia from itself.

So although Garrett a few weeks ago may have made a briefly outstanding promise to have the mill assessed for greenhouse emissions, he was quickly compelled (by ‘senior management’ no doubt) to clarify that perception.

So he’s screwed. He is unsupported within the Federal Party, and he is more or less trotted out like an over-qualified but otherwise discount Bono whenever meetings with the public or cool issues needing a supposedly progressive Labor approach are being discussed. . . in front of cameras.

It’s confusing – because the fact that he wants to have the mill’s fatal carbon load assessed is a good thing, and we really should support him for it, because his biggest battle isn’t against Turnbull or Howard, it’s against the Labor Party. But here’s the stupid thing – even with Labor and Garrett supporters, both are losing support by the hour over the lack of concern for the environment, due process, their own credibility, their lack of opposition to the Howardocrats, their lack of representation for the greater good on this resoundingly obvious issue, and their utter inability to stand for a principle – even one that will prove particularly popular come election day.

Stupid.

GetUp have thrown up a cool page here so you can read the L-party ghouls’ statements on just how big their balls are and make your own comments, which will hopefully get sent to the lame-o-crats’ in-trays.

Facebook – many reasons not to.

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A number of people i dig muchly have invited me to join Facebook over the last year but there are some things I just can’t get past. Without sounding at all like Miss Teen South Carolina, I hear you say ‘such as?’

Well, apart from the idea of giving some random entity your email password?

I haven’t seen the issue covered anywhere quite as well as in this article on New Media by James Massola in New Matilda earlier this year:

Given the volume of information that Facebook gathers, the question of who has access to it is an important one. A Privacy International report on the privacy policies of some of the biggest websites in the world — think BBC, Google and MySpace — gives Facebook its second lowest ranking.

More speculative than inquisitive, Binoy Kampmark has written a similarly valuable piece, Giving Good Face, at Counterpunch. Kampmark recontextualizes Facebook post-Virginia Tech massacre which backgrounds the visible head of the company well (but also makes me ask ‘can you name a single bombed out Iraqi School?’… ‘Baghdad Junior High’ gets points for effort). This article by Marie at CommonGroundCommonSense (!!!! – sheesh – there’s an idea, hey?) gives a very good rundown of some of the most concerning elements to the Facebook back story.

The Information Awareness Office seems to have survived some of its original purposes in a mutated form, found in today’s Facebook. In fact, one of IAO’s original example technologies included “human network analysis and behavior model building engines,” [10] a surprising echo of the social networking mapping that Facebook does using SVG visualizations. Read the rest of this entry »

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October 1, 2007 at 4:02 pm

Is The Sydney Morning Herald the new Daily Telegraph?

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It may be a strange question, considering that the old Daily Telegraph is still around. Nevertheless, what other possibility is there? For quite some time, SMH has been putting food on the tables of such self-contradicting wrong-wing nonces as Miranda Devine, Gerard Henderson, Michael Duffy, Alan Ramsey, etc. The justification is that the publication is pluralist and therefore provides comfort and staging to a number of different and potentially valid viewpoints. It’s an admirable goal but goes somewhat unachieved.

Yes, the paper certainly features reputable journalists and writers fluent and competent in a number of areas – Wendy Frew, Peter Hartcher, Philip Coorey, Mike Carlton, Ross Gittins, Annabel Crabb, the FOI Guy – to reel off a few from the top of my head. But that is not balance. That is the essential core of any worthwhile news publication.

But to balance Duffy et al the Herald would need to retain the services of rambling and irrational pseudo left wing quasi-intellectuals with a propensity for verbal diaorrhaea and monocular agenda-driven hateful nonsense poorly hidden behind tolerance for a cult of almost-personality. Maybe they should call me…

But why has my threshold been breached today of all days? Well, how about this – an Opinion piece from Bjorn Lomborg. It’s 2007 and a widely read publication is giving oxygen to Bjorn Lomborg. What reaction would be warranted if they gave similarly unqualified space to David Irving?

The Herald says that

Bjorn Lomborg is head of the Copenhagen Consensus Centre, adjunct professor at Copenhagen Business School, and author of The Skeptical Environmentalist and Cool It.

The Herald does not say that Lomborg is a statistician parading as a climatologist, nor does it mention that The Skeptical Environmentalist was thoroughly eviscerated and buried by specialists and experts when it surfaced like a turd at a pool party in 2001. Read the rest of this entry »

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September 27, 2007 at 5:55 pm

“Childrens do learn”. George Bush narrowly defeats challenge from Miss Teen South Carolina.

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There are ELEVEN people in this Photo.

Pick the TEN which you would trust to run a country…

“Are our childrens learning?” asked George

“Yes,” he replied, “our childrens do learn”

Don’t believe me? It’s all here. File under ‘how dumb is this bastard sent forth from Satan’s junk?’

Although it’s only a footnote to the story really, here is the part which really rocks my world:

Just a day earlier, the White House inadvertently showed how it tries to prevent Bush from making even more slips of the tongue than he already does.

As Bush addressed the UN General Assembly yesterday, a marked-up draft of his speech briefly popped up on the UN website, complete with a phonetic pronunciation guide to get him past troublesome names of countries and world leaders.

The W is for Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeak.

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September 27, 2007 at 1:48 pm

Bohemian Rhapsody in Lego

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it’s been that kind of a day

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September 23, 2007 at 10:22 pm

Australian Senator calls for War on Islam

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The Australian Christian Democratic Party (aka Senile Racist Homophobes for Jesus) have used this special day – the 6th anniversary of the World Trade Centre Attacks (as well as all other human tragedies associated with power imblances and this particular date) – to call for an all-out War on “Islamism”.

Their fundamental (deliberate choice of word, btw) concept of “Islamism” is that it’s a state of complete rejection of all non-Islamic values and beliefs – which does of course mean that it’s a murderous, woman-bashing, clitoris-removing, suicide-bombing, child-killing, murdering-of-the-innocents, defilement-of-God, racist, intolerant, baby-raping, self-aggrandizing and hateful way to live.

If this particularly offends you, you might want to email them via office@cdp.org.au or even phone them on (61 – 2) 9144 4568. There’s already been one bomb scare today, so maybe something less playful – like a direct spray of reasoned contempt – would be more appropriate.

The whole release follows. It’s almost too painfully fucktarded to ridicule in detail. Suffice to say, Reverend Fred Bile and his holy sidekick Pastor Paul Green think they’re being clever by calling for war on a faith held by around one-third of the world’s population because these are the ‘weapons’ they’re advocating: Read the rest of this entry »

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September 11, 2007 at 1:20 pm

Election-focussed Political Strategizing – a cartoonic metaphor

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also describable as ‘some seriously funny shit

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September 3, 2007 at 12:53 am

Just don’t bite it….

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Working out what the Hell is happening is half the fun so there’s just no explanation here for you. Click the Pic and feel real Sick! 😉

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September 1, 2007 at 12:39 pm

Some Handy Oz Aussie Awstraylyun WWWs Youse Wankerz.

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Tired of supporting viciously biased government-funded media outlets like the ABC that proclaim a concern for quality journalism but really just want to so dilute your understanding of Australia that you might end up thinking trees and social justice are good? Fret no more – some of the crew behind the all-too-awesome Chaser’s War on Everything have put together a web & print based weekly fresh out of publicational placenta. The Manic Times promises to do everything but suck. . . unless that’s what you really want it to do
by Robert Williams

An older hand of proven vision and good intentions is Richard Neville. Somehow stumbled across these pages the other day and wish i’d got there sooner.

Lots of luscious, original, and angry creativity here. Definitely good pages to spend a long time picking through and the endorsed links, writers, and artists all lead to similarly rewarding labyrinths.

But it may be that Neville is leaving his own pages undeveloped for a while to publish Home Page Daily which, in short, is a bloody terrific destination in the digital playground. Up and running for three months, I believe it’s still in beta version but it’s a Swiss Army News Blog with globally sourced climate, political, fake, angry, cynical, and cutting edge news and features in mixed media formats so you can read, watch, listen, etc. Very cool way to gauge what’s going on all over when you want to know but don’t have time.

This picture kind of sums up Blogotariat, but at the same time doesn’t at all.

It’ seems a bit shiny and new, but highly user-friendly, quite diversely assembled, and offers a good Australian lens to domestic and international news and events.

Hmm… is also non-partisan, in that it has something for everyone to like or hate lots. Is a bit of an aggregator building towards being a self-reliant web-zine for Australian webscribblers. Link-rich with a smatire.

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August 27, 2007 at 11:58 pm